Struggling With Starting Habits

Image by fotografierende from Pixabay 

Getting motivated and keeping a habit is pretty difficult. I'm always amazed at people who have this down. 

I think you have to have a good mindset to start a habit. It's more than just wanting to start a healthy habit. You have to have a why, and is that why strong enough to keep you motivated to maintain that habit? Above all you must be kind to yourself.

Sometimes the mind will tell us that we aren't good enough and won't be able to keep up so just quit now. Then we must remember that our mind doesn't know the truth. The mind just likes to stir people up and cause drama within ourselves- and sometimes outwardly with other people.

I've been wanting to get started on writing, jogging, and more meditation.

I always loved writing, ever since I knew how to read. I was fascinated by stories and wanted to mimic authors. It fell off the wagon when some events happened in life- as things always happen in life. I was unable to hold on to it though, and I've been wanting so bad to rekindle this love of reading and writing

Jogging is such a release of pent up energy. It feels awesome going for even a short jog. It's almost like a form of meditation to me. You concentrate on your breathing and on your steps. Yes, thoughts come but most of the time I don't think much other than my breathing with the occasional: "I can do this" thought. I am pretty present.

I have been doing ok with my morning meditations but not as much as I'd like to do. Perhaps jogging will help with this.

What is my why? I guess my why for writing would be simply that creative desire, or urge, that I have. It is always there but for some reason starting the process has been difficult for me. My why for jogging is simply to release that energy and stay healthy. Meditation would be to get rid of that mind clutter, even if it is only for that time. 

My mind is sometimes too loud and I know I must take that first step to show it. It'll be like me shaking my fist at the mind and telling it "oh yeah? I'll show you!" I must get over my mind.

Are there any habits you currently have? What about any habits you've struggled with making?

Embracing the Possibility of Change

"Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge."

-Eckhart Tolle

Image by klimkin from Pixabay 

I have decided to embrace the possibility of change. 

Change has always been very difficult for me (as I'm sure for many people). As an anxious and nervous person, change terrifies me so much that I withdraw into my cloudy thoughts of negative "What if's" and "But's".  There was a time when even if I was in a bad situation, the thought of change (knowing that change was needed) paralyzed me. I had a lot of fear, the negative thoughts always seem to triumphed over the good. 

After working on myself this past year (reading books and listening to stories) I can see the ray of sun peeping through those clouds. 

Since I've accepted the possibility of change, I haven't seen any change yet so I can't attest to my thought's reaction towards it. BUT...

I noticed that I no longer think of a change as something that looms closely, or that it will disrupt my life completely (even though it could). I am now thinking of change as something that will help me grow and transform.

I know that this seems obvious:
WITH CHANGE COMES EXPERIENCE AND GROWTH.

I've known this for a long time, but it is only until recently that I have accepted this. 

I will be in the present moment and for now, enjoy this moment as it is. If change comes then it comes and I will deal with it then, with the advice from Eckhart Tolle:

"Accept- then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally; not your enemy."

How have you dealt with change in the past and now?

I am Grateful for the Morning

She woke to the sound of the metro tooting,

letting everyone know it's coming through.

Another day, another toot.
She stretches, yawns and
folds her arms under her head.

I am grateful.
I can hear the morning sounds.
A rooster crows in the near distance—in someone’s backyard.
A dog’s collar jingles as it walks by. 

I am grateful.
I can see the morning light.
A deep breath and she looks towards the window.
Sunlight comes in through the sheer-like curtains. 

I am grateful.
I can smell the morning scents.
Another deep breath.
She draws in the remnants of last night’s rain.
A slow breath in, and she counts to eight,
inhaling the scent of wet earth. 

I am grateful.
I can feel the morning’s touch.
A gentle wind from the open window and
the curtain lightly waves.
Toes and feet caress the gray linen,
they curl and grab the sheet, pinching it, pulling it down.
The cold sheet slowly slides down the body,
like a cool intentional breeze
softly sweeping over her. 

I am grateful

(November was gratitude month and so I wanted to end it with this)

What are you grateful for today?

Let's Cut Our Unmindful and Unappreciative Way

Have you ever felt like you are not here? 

Lately I've been finding myself multi-tasking in a very unmindful and unappreciative way. As I talk to someone on the phone, listen to a podcast or even when I'm food prepping or cooking, I have been scrolling through Instagram or watching something on YouTube.

It's like I'm not fully there. I don't like it it because I'm not even enjoying the activity. I'm enjoying neither of the activities! Even worse, I am not giving my attention to the person on the phone, who takes time to make the phone call or seems to look forward to talking to me. 

4 Books For a Better Person

There are so many books out there that we can read to help us become a better person. I think most of us are always trying to better ourselves—internally.  We want to learn how to get rid of that hate, we want to heal from that trauma, we want to live joyfully, we want to be more compassionate and loving to ourselves and others. I think that is the best thing we can do in order for us to move forward. It really all starts with ourselves.

To be a better mother (or father) we must take care of ourselves. Nourish ourselves mentally and physically so that we can be better equipped to help our children. Help them deal with whatever emotional thing they are dealing with, and by modeling love and compassion towards others.

This is the same as a being a teacher. I remember one of the classes I took emphasized taking care of ourselves as teachers so that we can be suited to care for our students (meditation was one of the practices that was recommended). Being a preschool teacher can be very taxing, especially on our mental being, as we could have a troubled student that needs a lot of love, and/or a lot of attention, in addition to having to be there for the rest of the students. 

We must learn how to care for ourselves in order to be able to care for others. 

So, if we need to take care of ourselves first of all (both as parents and as teacher), then to be a better friend, or a better person and a better human being of this world, why shouldn’t we need to take care of ourselves first?

The One Thing You Must Do For Yourself Now

Spend time WITH yourself not just BY yourself. 

There is a difference. BY yourself means doing things on your own; independently. WITH yourself would mean that you are actually WITH yourself. You are getting to know yourself and understanding yourself. 

Mindful Morning

Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay 

I open and close my eyes as I stir in bed listening to a gentle tone of dings that progress loudly as seconds pass. It’s a tone I chose because it was a change from that original sharp shriek-like tone—if it could even be called a tone, that startles me from sleep.

A yawn ensues as I sit up, my feet on the cold floor, and take a few steps to the other side of the room. I press DISMISS on my phone, glad to have thought of placing it atop my bureau as it encourages me to get up from bed and stay up. 

After a few gentle stretches, I fold my legs and sit on a folded towel—hoping they can keep from falling asleep.

I settle into the towel placing my hands on my lap. My earphones are in and I begin to pay attention to my breathing as the meditation guide suggest.

Doing Laundry can Bring a Meditative State

Image by Alison Krejci from Pixabay 

You step into the laundromat and the smell of detergent tickles your nose. The heat generated from the machines warms your skin. You gently throw dirty clothes into the good washing machines. The one that cost a dollar more because that washes your clothes twice, and with a boy who doesn’t mind sitting or rolling around in the dirt, its the best choice. You have no quarters so you walk over to the change machine and insert your ten dollars. The quarters fall, each dropping with a clink into the metal bowl. You deposit your quarters one by one and watch as the money amount drops until it displays “press start.” You like that you can see your clothes spinning, submerged in bubbly water.

The Energy in Our Hands- Stillness

Image by skeeze from Pixabay 

Do you feel the energy in your hands? If you sit still with your hands on your lap and pay attention to them, you can feel the sensation of your blood flowing through your arm, your palms, your fingers. 

It's a reminder that you are alive. That you have these hands and arms to hold your loved ones, to transmit your love and energy. To receive their love and energy.

Why you should spend time with yourself

"Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful consumption, I am committed to cultivating good health, both physical and mental, for myself, my family, and my society by practicing mindful eating, drinking, and consuming" 

- Thich Nhat Hanh on The Nourishment and Healing Path

Image by MabelAmber from Pixabay

Is it really necessary to live in over indulgence?

These past five years I have come to understand how living simply is one of the keys to happiness within yourself and a joyful life.

The above quote comes from Hanh's book The Art of Living, and it is one of his Five Mindfulness Trainings. These five trainings are paths. Not paths TO happiness and freedom, but paths OF happiness and freedom. The paths should help bring us happiness while we are on it, but I do think that it is a process. As I am currently going through it, I can attest to this. 

Addicted to Excessive Thinking

Image by Ryan McGuire from Pixabay

You're having a difficult time being in the moment. 

You want to be able to shower and remember whether you shampooed your hair yet.

You want to be able to enjoy making your iced coffee without thinking of everything you have to do.

You know that you think too much and that you are addicted to excessive thinking. 

There are times you get so overwhelmed with your thoughts that you break down and cry.

You have realized that it is who you are, and you just need to accept it. 

Yes, it is difficult to accept something you don't like about yourself, especially something that makes you feel so emotionally drained. But you know that once you accept it, you will be better suited to work on it and pay better attention to the moment. 

Realizing that this is who you are would be the first step. Now what? 

Enjoy the Present Moment

Dreams can often times serve as reminders of what we need to pay attention in our lives.

The other night I dreamed of my son. He was about 2 years old, and he came running to me with his arms open. I can still feel the way his little arms wrapped around my neck, the warmth of his tiny body, and his soft cheek against mine. Sweet baby. When I awoke I let that image and feeling linger in my mind.

We must remind ourselves in the midst of our busy schedules, and even now during this pandemic, to enjoy the moment we have with our children, because we won't get it back. Being in the moment and enjoying it, is something I am currently working on.

Many of us are living either in the past or in the future.

To quote Eckhart Tolle in The Power Of Now:

“Time isn’t precious at all, because it is an illusion. What you perceive as precious is not time but the one point that is out of time: the Now. That is precious indeed. The more you are focused on time—past and future—the more you miss the Now, the most precious thing there is.”

This moment is what we have. Let's immerse ourselves in it.